Resistance and Grief

The word resistance kept appearing in front of me. It was mid-November. I saw it phrased as a question, “What are you resisting?” It appeared as a suggestion, “receive without resistance.” I contemplated what on earth it could mean. I dug deep to unearth what I was resisting or what I was supposed to receive without resistance. I came up empty.

About a week later, I got a shocking call from my dad that my mom had been killed in a car accident. In these past weeks, the word resistance has bubbled to the surface again.

It has been a gentle reminder in the middle of grief to receive without resistance the flowers, cards, gifts, calls, visits and messages.  A soft nudge as the weeks moved on, to open up to the beauty of the sunrise sky, the encouragement of a devotional reading or the warmth of a gold-tinged memory.

The question, “What am I resisting?” has become a reminder to allow grief its course. It is a reminder to let go of the fear of drowning in loss and instead to stop resisting and ride the waves of grief as they come.

This morning I found help in a blog post I wrote back in March this year about activating your coping capacity. You can find that post here.

As my gift to you this holiday season, I’d like to give you my self paced study guide to activating your coping capacity. If you’d like the study guide, please send an email to and I’ll send it to you.


Ps. I haven’t taken a lot of photos in the last month, but I will share with you this one of me with our dog. It’s a reminder to me to stop resisting and receive joy wherever I can find it.

4 thoughts on “Resistance and Grief

  1. Sue, thank for this piece. My sincere condolences with the loss of your Mom . May God grant you much peace and strength as you journey through your grief. Know that He will provide you with what you need at this time. My Mom, Marie Faber( sometimes its just comforting to see her name)died 21 years ago this month from breast cancer. Still I think of her so often and still miss her. I wish you a blessed Christmas.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Joanne. May God grant you peace and strength too. It is a great testimony of your love for your mum that her memories are so vividly alive in you after 21 years. Merry Christmas.


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