Are a year ago, today, my mum was killed in a car accident. I’m thinking about mum today, although to be honest, I think about her every day. Today does not seem harder than the rest (for me). I’m also reflecting on what I’ve learned about grief this past year.
My walk this morning closely resembled my emotional and mental landscape at present – somewhat mucky and muddy, a bit slippery, drizzly, overcast and minus a lot of the usual things that bring me joy.
The word resistance kept appearing in front of me. It was mid-November. I saw it phrased as a question, “What are you resisting?” It appeared as a suggestion, “receive without resistance.” I contemplated what on earth it could mean. I dug deep to unearth what I was resisting or what I was supposed to receive without resistance. I came up empty.