This past week has been particularly challenging. It was the two-month anniversary of my mum’s sudden death yesterday. Today would have been her birthday.
About a week ago, a quote I had saved some years ago resurfaced. The question it asked:
If this was the last week of your life, would you do what you are about to do? What would you change?
Sometimes this can be about the big things like whether to continue in the job you’re doing, but for me, it became more about the small stuff – the daily choices I was making.
Last week as I thought about it, I found that there was not a whole lot I would change about my life right now. I know that sounds strange, given that we are in the middle of a pandemic. It’s not that I don’t wish the pandemic would be over. It was more a sense of being happy about who I was being in the middle of the circumstances. This week, there are quite a few things I would change. As I imagined myself at the end of my days looking back at what was happening now, the perspective helped me realize that some of the details that seem to matter a lot right now actually aren’t important. What matters are the people, the relationships and who I am being and becoming. What matters are my choices for loving and courageous action.
My mum didn’t have the chance to know her time was at an end, to have those last conversations. I wonder if she had what she might have said. I know that I want to say now what matters to those that are important to me. We never know when it might be our last week.
I haven’t spent much time taking photos this past week, but for those of us in the northern hemisphere I think we need a reminder of the sun. This week’s photos were taken in our garden a year or two ago.
This mental fitness material has made a big difference for me personally. I’ve also heard tremendous feedback from others I’ve worked with. Let me know if you would like more information.